Let Me Introduce Myself

Hello everyone!

As some of you may have already guessed from prior posts and updates I'm Rosa's new Assistant! (Assistant... Intern... Apprentice... whatever you want to call it really) Basically I'll be their to help Rosa with all her projects, carry photography equipment, act as second shooter, brainstorm new ideas, and probably make sure she finds time to eat, all while learning the fine art of photography under her patient - and very fun - tutelage.

I'll also be in charge of writing a blog post every week, so check back every Wednesday to see what I'm up to!

As excited as I am to be writing this post  I have to admit that I wasn't entirely sure what to say - this is my first blog post after all. After quite some time humming and hawing over what I was going to write, I figured I'd just tell you a little bit about myself. So here goes!

My name is Kim, I'm married to Rosa's oldest son, Morgan, and we have a cat named Smarty and a fish named Pyramus. I love to cook, bake, make crafts, read, and -of course- take pictures. I strongly dislike spiders, Styrofoam, and doing the dishes.  I like to play video games, go for walks, and listen to soundtracks of musicals and french opera. I also absolutely love to learn! I'm always eager to gain more knowledge.

I'm super excited for this opportunity to join Rosa on her quest to learn, grow, and - of course - have fun!

Thats it for me this week, but make sure to keep up to date with A Life of Whimsy, we have a schedule full of projects, DIYs, tasty recipes, and photography planned!

Until next Wednesday,

Kim

Shutting out the Noise of the World Wide Web.

I can't enjoy reading a good book the way I used to.

From the time I first learned to read, I reveled in the abilitly to pick up a book and, regardless of where I was, find myself lost to the world around me, deep in what ever adventures were unfolding on the pages before me.

It drove my mom crazy. She would trip over me in the oddest of places, curled up, book in hand, deaf to the world around me.

I have a very busy brain. It never really shuts off. In the last several months, I started noticing that I couldn't read a book with that deep, single minded focus anymore. I found myself fiddling with the top corner of my book's pages, riffling through them as I read. Every few pages my mind would jump out of the story and look for something else.

  "I really should be cleaning the kitchen."
"That laundry pile is growing deeper by the minute. Maybe I should run down and throw a load in the washer."
"Man, those weeds are getting high, I should probably get out there and do something about them."

Those thoughts are nothing new. They are thoughts I began to have (and ignore) the day I got married and had a home and husband of my own to care for. A good book usually won out and by the time I got to chapter three, they would leave me alone until I'd finished the book.

Not now though. Now my mind also jumps to thoughts like, "Hmmm, it's been 20 minutes since I've checked Facebook, I'd better go see what's happening there." or, "I wonder if I have any new email?"

Things have gotten even worse since I made the decision to pursue photography as a profession. 

There's photography techniques to learn, like composition, exposure, editing and off camera flash, or marketing, social media and how to run a business. The list of things I need to learn to run a successful, lasting, photography business just goes on and on.

I love to learn. I research everything to death. In pre Google days that meant a large stack of books beside my chair that I could dip in to when ever I got the chance. Books I would read through from cover to cover.

Now???

Now the minute a question or idea pops into my head I can run to the computer any time of the day or night and google the subject to my heart's content, coming up for air hours later, as I succumbed to the need to follow just one more link.

It's gotten even worse since I gave in and started checking my emails and Facebook on my iPhone. Although I might have deliberately turned off my computer on a particular day, I could still distract myself with my phone.

Even if I could fool myself into thinking all this 'research' was the best way to move forward with my photography, the fact of the matter is, I just can't accept that I'll never again be able to lose myself in a good book the way I did when I was a kid.

I want my husband and my kids to once again trip over me in odd places, book in hand, deaf to the world around me.

Morgan and Kim are getting married in two weeks. Hunting season has started and Henry's going to be in the bush as often as he possibly can until the end of November.

And I am going back to my childhood. It's time to quiet my mind and learn once again to focus on one thing at a time.

Aside from my Still Life photography class, which is online, I'm going to stay off the internet until,  gulp . . . the end of November.

I will check my email each morning but then all my devices will be turned off for the rest of the day.

I have a stack of fiction piled high beside my chair, cook books bristling with markers for new  baking recipes to try out for the wedding and an assortment of photography challenges I've set for my self to do rather than to read about how to do.

I honestly don't know if I will succeed at this challenge, but the sweetness of losing myself in a good book, or the ability to focus on one. thing. at .a. time. is too precious not to try my hardest to do so.

I know I won't be able to resist Instagramming or Facebooking a few pictures of the wedding though, so I am giving myself an exemption for that. ;D (Look for me there on the weekend of November 7th. Henry and I will be celebrating our 30th anniversary that Sunday as well!)

I'd love to know if any of you struggle with the lure of the world wide web. . . .

 For some reason, I'm not able to access the comments on my blog at the moment, but I do see each and every one in my email inbox, so please, drop me a line and let me know I'm not the only one . . .

See you December first.

A Life of Whimsey Just got a Makeover!

This had been in the works for quite some time. I was never really happy with my last makeover and my efforts to fix things didn't work at all.

Truthfully, weirdly, it made me not want to blog. I felt so depressed looking at my blog when a new post went up, that, even when I wasn't crazy busy and had a little time to write I just . . . didn't.

I've tried learning how to change up the design myself over the years with very little success. I seriously doubt that coding will ever be in my future.

So, what can a bummed out blogger do??

She can turn to the professionals!

I've also been mulling over what to do about my photography portfolio site and found myself on Etsy time and again, looking for a new logo, or marketing packages that could help me find a 'look' that I loved and could keep for the long haul, rather than changing it out time and again because I was never quite satisfied.

I've finally done it!

With a beautiful photographer's marketing package from Brydka at Studio Bee Kay and the fabulous web design skills of Rita over at CoffeeShop Designs I'm finally happy with both my blog design and my portfolio site. Brydka included a ton of elements in her marketing package including a logo, Blog Header (which Rita made into a slide show!) cool frames and a Facebook timeline cover. She also added pretty much anything I'll need for marketing once I'm ready to go from amateur to professional photographer. (I'm aiming for early next spring . . .)

It's all just so pretty and I'm pretty sure you'll be seeing me here more often. Don't forget to check out all the fun links on the menubar under my header. Rita did a fabulous job with that as well!

I'm a huge 'do-it-yourselfer' but sometimes . . . it just makes more sense to turn to the professionals!

Thank you ladies for giving me this  beautiful design and all the tools I need to 'do-it-myself' going forward. 

You are awesome!

So . . . what do you think? Do any of you find it more difficult to work in a less than appealing environment or is it just me???

PicMonkey. A Free Photo Editor I use to create collages and more . . .

I keep thinking I need to learn how to use Photoshop. There are so many cool things I could do with it.

But my oh my is there ever a steep learning curve!

A fellow blogger gave a class on making 'pinnable' pictures at this year's Blog West conference.

Pinnable pictures often include text or graphics of some kind and that's something that can be done in Photoshop. Assuming you can figure out how to do it. I always seem to need to add text to a picture right this instant, leaving me no time for any figuring out.

Enter PicMonkey.

I admit, to my shame, that I poo pooed this free and oh so simple online photo editor. After all, serious bloggers surely used only the most sophisticated of programs. Didn't they?

Our blogging instructor was a very serious blogger. And used PicMonkey. Perhaps she had good reason?

She sure did. While making my first tutorial a while back I realized I was going to need a 'pinnable' picture to go with it. Something that explained what the tutorial was all about. I still didn't know how to use Photoshop so I googled PicMonkey and just plunged in.

I can't believe I waited so long! It's simple, flexible and free. You can do more than I ever imagined.

I made a collage for Travel Tuesdays.

I made a Facebook banner for our Travel Tuesdays' Facebook page.

I played with effects and banners.

Themes . . .

And collages . . .

And for $33 a year I can add extra fonts and fancy features!

PicMonkey where have you been all my (blogging) life???

Will I ever learn Photoshop???

 Absolutely! I bought an online Photoshop course called Fine Art Grunge and I'm just waiting for the garden to go to sleep so I'll have time to work on it.

One more thing to add to my bloggy bag of tricks.

How did I learn to use PicMonkey? Check out these blogs for their tutorials:

The Coupon Project

The Blog Guide Book

The Blog Guide Book (2)

Something Swanky

Something Swanky (2)

The best part? You don't have to be a blogger to use this. Make a vacation collage or a 5x7 photo collage card of your new baby or the family. Create a cute Christmas card or make an inspirational poster with your favorite picture and quote to put on Facebook. The sky's the limit!

Have Fun!

  * I am in no way affiliated with PicMonkey. I just really, really love what I can do with their program.

Concrete Leaf Sculptures. BIG ones!

I was in bed last night (Friday) before I realized that I hadn't blogged.

 I've been dog sitting Jada's friend Diesel, doing all the things you do to keep a household running smoothly . . . (not) . . . and working on giant rhubarb leaf sculptures.

I  had offers of rhubarb after mine was destroyed in a hail storm  but in the end found some beautiful stuff down the street. (Still hoping to get hosta leaves though . . .)

These giant ones though take up a lot of time, energy and concrete. I ended up having to go out and buy a more powerful drill to hook up to my blender tool as the one I had kept smoking!

Very disconcerting . . .

I hope to get at least four large ones made although I'm aiming for five. The biggest problem with that is though, that each leaf takes up an entire table and has to stay there for two days rather than one. As I only have two tables and each leaf takes several hours to make it's rather slow going. (Real life stuff getting in the way isn't helping much either. (dishes . . . laundry . . . supper . . . sigh.)

But IT is sooo much fun! There is nothing like unmolding my newest leaf and seeing all the detail captured in concrete.

It's an odd thing, but whenever I focus in on detail or the small things in life whether it's through concrete, photography, writing or just plain living those moments, I feel the Lord right there beside me, showing me the wonder of his creation and the vastness of his love for us. God really is in the detail and I've come to realize that those details are what I really have a passion for regardless of the way in which I experience them. It is through those details that I am coming to know Him more and more each day.

It gives me the shivers.

Now I'm off to make more leaves. I'm not sure I'll be posting Monday, it will depend on how far I get but Tamara and I will both be here on Tuesday for our new Travel Tuesdays link ups.

And because we love a good party, even a virtual one, we have a little something extra planned to allow more people to join in the fun!

See you tomorrow!

Offline Today.

I got up yesterday at 5 am.

That's not unusual.

I got out at 5:30 am.

That's not unusual.

I was on the computer by 6:30 am

That's a little unusual . . .

I got off the computer at 11 pm.

That's very unusual . . . .

But aside from a few food and bathroom breaks, that's how long it took me to figure out how to edit my pictures for yesterday's Moss Basket tutorial in my new Lightroom 5 program, make a watermark (still not there!) and add text to one off my pictures to (hopefully) make it more 'pinnable'.

So today???

I'm going to have a Happy Birthday tea with my sister-in-law Leona, take Jada for a long walk, photograph everything and edit nothing and snuggle with my sweetheart.

I'll be offline until tomorrow.

Have a fabulous day!

A Big Thank You and a Free Gift for Everyone.

I wanted to thank everyone who gave me such great ideas for garden classes. It was good to know many of them were things I had already planned on.

 There were also some I hadn't thought of and a few of them had my mind spinning off in new directions!

So again, a big thank you to everyone who participated!

As promised, I have drawn a name from everyone who left a comment and we have a winner . . .

Congratulations  Sigrun! Send me an email with your address and I'll send you your thank you Dutch Birthday Calendar just as quickly as I can.

Also as promised, I have a gift for everyone who sent me ideas. I have been thinking about this for a while and finally figured out how to make it possible.

I have a free printable for everyone who helped me out!

This is a pretty big one and will only be offered this once and only for a short time.(The link will be live through August 11 just in case some of you are on holidays) I am in the process of learning how to make other types of printables and hope to offer more in the future.

In the mean time  . . . here's the link to a downloadable Dutch Birthday Calendar file. It's pretty large so it takes a little bit to load.      Dutch Birthday Calendar Printable.  I do ask that you not share this file with anyone. I am happy for you to make more than one copy if you would like to give it as a gift  but the file itself is only for you to use. Between taking the photos, editing them and making a template for the calendar it took up quite a lot of my time and I would rather not have it end up floating around on the web somewhere.

Thanks for understanding.

You can print this out on your printer on  81/2 x 11" card stock or photo paper. There are two calender pages on each sheet so you will need to cut down the center of the page for each one. Add a hole (or two) at the top of every page and tie them together with twine or a pretty ribbon and voila! A Dutch Birthday Calendar!

Some of you might be kicking yourselves right about now. You intended to leave me an idea or perhaps the sight of this lovely calendar has caused a garden class idea to pop right into your head . . .

No worries . . . Just leave an idea in the comments (and yes Ev, telling me all my ideas are fabulous and you haven't got anything better counts. ;D ) and download away!

Make sure you tune in on Monday for a don't miss tutorial that mixes Superstore,  flowers, moss and a feminine hygiene product in a most unusual way.

Until then . . . Have a great weekend!

Deep. Dark. Secrets.

There are a few things you may not know about me that I thought I would share. . .

House plants try to hide behind each other when I stroll past them in the big box greenhouse.

 The word is out.

 Go home with Rosa and three months later?  You are a crispy, brown mess, just one day from being tossed in the garbage. She'll save your pot though. . .

When I bake smarties cookies I put them in small Ziploc bags and stash them in a variety of locations in the freezer.

I put a token dozen in the cookie tin and eat the rest  of them on the sly. Shhhhh . . .

Ditto lemon sugar cookies, although, Holly seems to have caught on. She eats as many of those as I do.

I don't like to drive.

 I do not understand the appeal of a road trip. If someone else can do the driving I let them. Better yet. . . I'll fly instead. (Yes . . . I drove a school bus for nearly 20 years.)

When I was young I liked to make up songs and sing them for other kids, pretending they were not made up songs. 

As a matter of fact Tamara and I made up a song (With the organ? someone's piano?) that I still clearly remember . .  Toyland, toyland, Toyland, toyland,  you can sing and play all dayaye . . .  Ring any bells Tam??

When I went to kindergarten I had a huge crush on a cute boy named Stanley.

I was positive that we were perfect for each other. After all, I was Rosa Terpstra and he was Stanley.

 R. S. T.

 It was meant to be! I'm not sure I ever knew his last name. Not that it would have mattered. Who can argue with R.S.T. ???

I hate fish and deer meat.

Oh wait! That's not a secret. . . . That's Henry's lifelong sorrow. . .

Do you have any deep, dark secrets that you want to share???

Guess what the UPS Man Brought. . .

I was stirring the spaghetti sauce for dinner last night and saw the UPS truck pull up in front of my neighbor's house.

"Hmmm... I wonder if that's for me?? No, of course not, the UPS man is always delivering things to the neighbors."

Wait, what . . . hang on, he's coming to MY house!

I ran to the front door, threw the bags full of recycle stuff out of the way and excitedly opened the door.

What could it be???

I didn't order. . . oh wait! Yes I did! And it got here in a week??

Look what I got. . .

 
Ooooh . .  all my newly made marketing materials . .

Business cards, product cards, postcards and a small banner!

I decided to use postcards rather than brochures. They are less expensive and up until now at least, I haven't actually handed out that many brochures. People seem to like the postcards better

Look! They match my website and blog now!

My business card, the large product tag as well as two smaller product tags that I had printed on one card.

All I have to do now is cut 500 cards in half, punch holes in all my product tags and add some twine. 

Sounds like I need to put on a good movie and get to work!

I am so thrilled with how my business site, blog and marketing materials have all come together.

A big thank you to Jana from Little Web Writing Hood for a beautiful job well done.

Thanks again Jana!

*And to all of you? Sorry for the lavish use of exclamation and question marks today. It's been a long time coming ( I kept trying to do it all myself. Bad idea!) and I just couldn't help myself!!!

Day Two at Blogwest

What an amazing day at Blogwest!

This is how we started our day . . .

With Jayson Acquilanti: Your Future! A Visual Metaphor

In this 45-minute workshop, examine your current business situation and future vision through the use and application of Visual Explorer(™) cards, a tool for creative conversations and deep dialogue.  Through the use of a wide variety of images about almost any topic, you’ll have the chance to take part in guided conversations about the things that are happening right now, and your prospects down the road.  This session will deliver:

1. Through imagery, the opportunity to examine your current situation
2. The chance to discover meaning behind your image selections
3. Insight and clarity on areas of focus to develop a long term vision of where you’d like to be in five years

It was an unusual exercise but one that really opened my eyes. We do see the world differently from each other. I saw one thing in the visual card and my partner saw another, but what we saw spoke to what was important to us as individuals. I saw an exciting story of adventure and adversity and my partner saw a woman of strength and courage.

Very cool . . .

I am on information overload right now.  I made a grilled cheese sandwich for supper, got into my pj's and I'm going to spend the rest of the night in bed with a good book.

I can hardly wait until tomorrow!

p.s.

One of the sessions was on journalism. We were asked if we had the two books on grammar and punctuation. (Who knew there was a standard?) I will be picking this up first thing. Perhaps it will prevent me from using commas with  such reckless abandon.

Day One Of Blogwest

I came home with a fistful of cards.

And promptly spent the next few hours on the computer checking out new blogs. . .

Wow! There are some amazing writers out there and sometimes it takes events like this to get you outside of your comfort zone, to be willing to try something new. To learn something new.

I read a variety of blogs, all of which I would not have discovered any other way. After all, when you find a blog you like, you check out their blogroll and find more blogs you like, check out their blogroll and find more blogs you like and-- while they are all fabulous blogs-- they tend to be of the same tribe. Inside your comfort zone.

I read one blog in particular that really spoke to the voracious reader in me. The reader who in days gone by read everything she could get her hands on. Who went out of her way to read things that were provocative ( as in, thought provoking), quirky or just plain odd.  This blog was so very well written it made me realize just how much work I had to do in that regard. To be honest, it made me hesitate before blogging tonight.

Because people. . . I can not write like that! But, she expresses her self much differently than I do. Some of those ways are outside my comfort zone. It has never been clearer to me that I am a middle aged, conservative woman. Who needs a little shaking up. Who's experiences have perhaps become a little too predictable. It's time to expand my horizons again.

I read a beautiful design blog, checked out an inspiring site for writers and a lovely blog by a young mom who also had cancer last year.

I came to the conference to learn new things. So far so good.

I can hardly wait until tomorrow.

Under Construction!

From the flower show . . . because I thought it was pretty! :D

Well, the picture doesn't have a thing to do with this post but . . . I like pictures with my posts, so I put it in anyways!

If you are here you can see that there have been significant changes.

We are under construction!

There may be a few glitches and things might look a bit wonky but we hope to have everything running smoothly in the next few days.I wouldn't try to subscribe or follow until everything is straightened out though. If you were a follower you may have to re-follow once we are done.

Thank you for your patience!

Cancer Changes The Way You Think . . . About Everything.

Cancer really does change the way you think. The way you see the world and your role in it.

At least, it has for me.

I'm no longer willing to let the little things drive me crazy . . . most of the time. (Ahem. shockingly, I'm still not perfect . .)

I no longer assume that kissing my husband, hugging my kids or telling someone I love them, can wait until tomorrow.

Letting fear dictate what I will or will not try seems incredibly foolish now. It doesn't mean I'm never afraid, I often am. I'm just not willing to let that stop my from trying . . . anything.

There are so many things I want to see, learn and do.

I may not like them, or even be particularly good at them. But that's not going to keep me from trying. Not anymore.

I've got a sale coming up in April that my sister-in-law Leona and I are hosting along with a friend . I'm having a great time coming up with new products to sell. Will people buy them? I'm pretty sure they will.

There's no guarantee though . . . but, I'm willing to risk it.

I'm having a plant sale in May regardless of the uncertainties. If I can't keep up with all that's needed for a fabulous plant sale??? I'll have a smaller plant sale . . . or call in friends and family to help.

I'm still taking my camera everywhere. I have so much to learn it boggles the mind. I might never do much more than take 'nice' pictures . . . but I'm willing to do the very best I can regardless.

The home I keep for my loved ones has become more precious. The food I cook more worthwhile.

The garden an expression of God's majesty. My way of showing the world around me the beauty of His creation.

I've always loved to write. To tell stories. But I didn't go to university. I don't have a degree in English  My grasp of the proper use of punctuation is tenuous at best. (Something you already know if your a regular reader . . .) Spell check is my dearest friend.

Writing and letting people know where I write or what I write is scary.

 Very scary.

The time has come to push past scary.

To change. To take blogging and maybe even story writing, seriously.

That means writing and telling people about my writing. Visiting and talking to other writers. (Scary stuff  for an introvert people!)

My first step?

Something big.

I'm revamping the blog. Updating the look and . . . and  . . .

Giving it a new name!

When I started blogging five years ago it was to challenge myself to write something everyday for a year. I was a gardener. I wasn't quite middle aged.

Diary of a middle aged gardener.

It was cute.

A few months ago my cousin Faith sent me a card in which she mentioned that her family knew me as the middle aged gardener. It gave me quite a shock.

I am a middle aged gardener!

Somehow it's not so cute anymore . . .

I began tossing out ideas for new names. Most of them ridiculous.

Then Holly came up with' A life of Whimsey'. Because, she said, it made her think of me.

Hmmmm. . .

Google the definition of whimsey . . .    A quaint or fanciful quality. Yes, that sounds about right. Why else would I decide to use the alternate spelling of whimsy? Spell check is not my friend in this case!

As we speak, I have a lovely designer working madly on a new look for my blog. The hope is to have it in place before next Thursday.

Because that's the next part of the plan. The super scary, don't forget your inhaler part of the plan . . .

I'm going to a three day blog conference. By myself! To talk to strangers. Alone. . . .

Thankfully, the one thing I have learned over these past months is that I am never alone.

Philippians 4:13

New International Version (NIV)

¹³ I can do all this through him who gives me strength.

In honor of all this change I felt it was time to update my picture. After all, the one on my sidebar was five years old and I would hate to be accused of false advertising!

Holly was my makeup artist, hairdresser and stylist. We had a plan. We headed to the dog park with Jada and a camera.

Jada stayed in the truck while Holly grabbed the camera and I headed for the nearest tree.

Now what?

"Do something mom!"

"Don't put your hand on the tree for every shot!"

We didn't have a plan . . .

But eventually, after many, many pictures . . .

We got a few good ones.

Don't you love my facinator? Holly bought it for me after my first surgery.

I'm so excited about the new look and the new name.

A Life of Whimsey. filled with homekeeping, gardening, photography and adventure.

I hope you all like it as much as I do.

Can You Believe It's Been Three Weeks?!

Of all the things I assumed I would not be able to do after my surgery, blogging was not one of them!

After Morgan and Jesse bought me my tablet, I was positive blogging from my chair would be a breeze. . .

Who knew how hard it would be to type on a tiny touch screen, or that I couldn't load  my pictures onto the tablet?

Who knew that  I would be able to put my own socks on long before I would be able to sit at a desk for more than a minute or two?

However. . .

It's finally happened.

I am once again able to sit at my desk for an hour or so without  serious discomfort.

Whoo Hoo!

So people. . .

I'm back to regular blogging. I won't promise a post everyday because I still poop out by early afternoon but . . .  if I don't start writing some of the posts swimming around in my brain my head is likely to explode!

How am I doing these days???

My drain has been out for just over a month now and I am happy to report that it hasn't caused problems at all.

I went to the lymphodema clinic twice a week for nearly three weeks, first learning how to do the lymph massages for myself and then getting regular massages from the therapists. At my last visit I was told that I may have escaped lymphodema (for now) and I am to visit again at the end of this month for further assessments. I still massage at the end of the day and wear compression bike shorts at all times but there is a possibility that it might not be forever. (And even if it was. . . if that was the worst of it. . . I would be incredibly thankful!!)

I can now do the stairs normally at least once in the day and my leg bends a little further every day. Still can't bend down too far or sit on the ground but . . . everything in good time.

I have been getting out and about, baking, crafting, taking pictures and even doing the laundry again. A fact that thrills Henry to no end.

 Housekeeping is not his forte.

Mine either . . .

See you all on Monday!

Jada LOVES it when I bake.

Biopsy Results. . . Not What We Had Hoped For. . .

I have been dreading writing this post.

I have so been enjoying writing everyday that I had decided I would keep it up no matter what came my way.

I have missed a few days this month but. . .

I had good reason.

When I went for my checkup a week or so after surgery, I went on my own, not expecting results from the biopsy. After all, we had been told it would likely take two weeks.

However, the results were in. And they were not what we had hoped for.

 The original site on my stomach came back clean, but the cancer had traveled. It was found in one of my lymph nodes.

I was one of the 20%.

So what next?

Melanoma can not be treated by chemotherapy or radiation. These therapies are sometimes used if someone is in the late stages but they are meant to alleviate symptoms, not cure or even necessarily put the cancer into remission. *edit 2016. At my last check up my melanoma doctor told me there is now treatment for melanoma that can actually cure this cancer! It's new and from the sounds of it, the best protocol isn't fully funded yet but . . . it's amazing news for anyone who's cancer can not be treated with surgery.

Melanoma is treated by surgery. The goal is always to take out as much as possible (within reason of course!) around the cancer site in hopes of catching any stray cells.

To keep it from traveling.

So. . .

Deep Breath. . .

I will be going for a radical groin dissection and muscle transfer this coming Tuesday at the Misericordia Hospital.

This involves removing all the fat above the area of my groin where the biopsied lymph nodes were removed. They will go down my leg a ways, removing all the other lymph nodes in this cluster, as well as all the fat. That will leave two major arteries (veins??) exposed right under the skin.  To protect them, they will detach the top of a long muscle  that you use to cross your leg. It will be moved from the outside top of my thigh and reattached it to the top of my groin area, thus covering up the arteries(veins??) and protecting them from harm.

As you can imagine, this is not a very common surgery but I have an amazing surgeon who has been practicing for twenty years and she has done many of them.

Which is very comforting. . . It is a very good thing when all the nurses comment on how thorough your surgeon is. . .

Complications from this surgery are common, both because of it's location and the fact that my leg will go numb down to my knee. As Dr. Dabbs explained, it might seem great that you don't feel the pain but neither do you always realize when you have done something you shouldn't have.  (And I have a very hard time sitting still or taking things easy!)

Infections are common.

Redoing stitches at least once is common.

My leg can stay numb with pins and needles or electric shooting pains for up to a year. Sometimes longer.

Lymphodema often occurs. This happens when when the fluid normally dispersed by the lymph nodes can't find a way out and begins to build up in your leg. If not caught early it can become a lifelong issue.

I'd add a link to that but, foolishly, I went googling at four in the morning the night I learned what was happening and, of course, found a horrifying, worst case scenario picture that kept me awake for the rest of the night.

Thankfully when I called my dear friend Nicole the next morning, she laughed at me (she's a nurse) and told me I could find pictures just as bad from infected toenails!

 Lesson learned.

 But I am not looking at any more links. . .

I have been told that my surgeon and I will see a lot of each other for about two months. . .

I have decided to do all I can to keep those visits to a minimum.

To that end, I have been thinking through what might cause problems and working out what I hope might be solutions to those problems. . .

My kids have thrown in their two cents,  Henry's family has been wonderful and my sister Lisa came up to add her substantial contribution. . .

My sister Tamara left me with something to occupy my mind. . . something to dream about. . .

Because, for me at least, three quarters of the fun of any event is the planning and the dreaming.

And I love to plan and dream!

 What if your plans don't work out the way you thought they might???

You still had the joy of the planning and dreaming!

I am doing more pre blogging with the idea that there will still be posts at least every other day.

I having been posting links this month on many of my friend's and family's Facebook walls but that won't work for a scheduled post, so, if you are interested in coming on this journey with me, just bookmark me, become a follower (although I think that is only helpful if you have a google account or a blog of your own), or Follow by e-mail. (that sends any new posts straight to your email and is one of my favorite ways to follow a blog. ).

I have been asked by several people how they can comment if they do not blog or have a google account. It is very simple. Sign in as anonymous, write your comment and sign your name so everyone knows who's commenting. Click on 'Publish your Comment' and you are done! Commenting from hand held devices doesn't always work however, so you could always leave a comment on Facebook (I'd be happy to 'friend' you) or even e-mail me if you really wanted to. . . rosa_veldkamp@hotmail.com

Simple.

So. . .

I will keep blogging and when there is something to share about my journey with cancer I will do it here.

But. . . really. . .  it's more fun to focus on those things that bring joy and remind us of God's grace and goodness, so the plan is to continue Looking for the Beautiful in the Everyday. . . my blogging theme for this month. 

And perhaps my theme in the months ahead. . .

I hope you join me.

**And in the spirit of Looking for the Beautiful in the Everyday. . .

A Big Fail At Blogging For 31 Days Straight!

Lisa in HER kitchen. . .

My sister Lisa flew in to visit yesterday and we were so busy visiting and doing that I somehow forgot to blog yesterday!

Bummer!

Oh well. . . .

Sometimes, life's like that!

We've (okay. . . she's) been super busy today and Rebecca dropped by to lend a hand for the afternoon as well, so we've been having a grand time. . .

 But, all of a sudden. . .

I'm pooped!!!

So. . .

Tomorrow is another crazy busy day as we (or, if Lisa has her way. . .she. . .) get(s) a whole bunch more done so we can spend Thursday morning having fun before she flies home later that afternoon.

I am, of course, taking pictures as we go along, so I will be posting fully on all our activities as soon as it slows down a bit. . .

Stay tuned, because seriously???

That woman is amazing!!!

Technical difficulties . . .

I had planned to post about the lovely meal we had tonight for Crystal's birthday.

Tamara, Byron , Rebecca and Evan came as well, so we made it quite an occasion!

However, once again, techonology failed me.

My computer got all glitchy on me and i had to shut it down.

So here is a quick post to tell you to tune in tommorow  for a post with pictures galore . . .

31 Day of Looking for Beauty in the Everyday

Last year I enjoyed the Nestor's 31 days series.

(Links to 31 days posts. . .)

Day 2 Homemade Bread,  Day 3 Beauty in Concrete, Day 4 Lunching with a Friend  Day 5 Beauty in fall leaves,  Day 6 An Unexpected Opportunity to Create, Day 7 The Beauty of Being a Goat at Thanksgiving
Day 8 The Beauty of Family at Thanksgiving  Day 9 Surgery Today Day 10 My Recovery Nest Day 11 Beautiful, Helpful, Big Boys  Day 12 Getting Ready For Halloween Day 13Another Sneak Peak at Concrete Leaves  Day 14 The Process. . . Concrete Leaves  Day 15 A Fall Visit to Wellington Garden Center  Day 16 The Beauty of Acreage Fresh Eggs

Day 1

This year I was determined to participate as well, because this year, I had a topic close to my heart and I was very excited (and a little scared. . .) to write about it.

This past year has not been an easy one. Approaching menopause caused my hormones to start doing a crazed version of the Hokey Pokey a few years ago, leaving me with serious anxiety as a result. (did any of you know that hot flashes are not the only symptom of changing hormones??? I sure wish I had. . .) I was having anxiety attacks out of the blue and had to constantly question whether my feelings were reasonable or  a result of the Hokey Pokey going on in my body.

Driving a bus load of school kids through one construction zone after another became a real challenge and I was so very grateful when my youngest graduated last year, as that meant the end of school fees which allowed me to retire, beginning a long held dream of  putting my Master Gardener's certificate to good use by going into business for myself.

 Of course, the fact that I was no longer in a stressful job didn't mean that the Hokey Pokeying had stopped.

 It just gave me something else to be anxious about. . .

When I left bus driving, I  left my bus kids and their parents with a  bit of a problem.  A lovely young woman was willing to drive the bus for that year but she had small children and was only able to provide a shortened version of the bus route. That meant most of the parents would have to drive to and from a common pick up point rather than getting the near door to door service they were used to.

Guilt and anxiety seem to go hand in hand for me. I spent months feeling guilty, which in turn caused more anxiety. . .

A lot of it. And not just about retiring. About everything I did.

I baked bread? But I didn't bake cookies. We ate store bought.

 I grew lettuce? But half of it ended up in the compost because I didn't make a salad with dinner. (or worse yet, I threw it into the garbage because it was quicker.)

 I started flowers from seed? But half of those ended up in the compost pile when I waited too long to transplant them.

The year I had looked forward to for so long was just. so. hard.

So I prayed. And prayed. And searched God's word. And prayed some more.

And then. . .

Slowly. . . quietly. . .  I began to see beauty again.

In the midst of a hard day something small would catch my eye, and the simple beauty of it would wash over me, leaving me certain of God's power and majesty right there in the everyday.

More and more, I would see beautiful bits of everyday:

 Seeds that sprouted. . .

  Light shining through the kitchen window, throwing a magical glow on a pot of tulips. . .

The astounding color found in the yolk of my farm fresh egg. . .

 A bear hug from one of the boys. . .

 The gleam from a freshly washed glass cake stand.

Dog walking became a favorite activity as Jada and I would jump into the truck, making a quick drive to a spot in the city filled with gracious old houses, well tended gardens and a view over the river valley.

 God spoke to me in these beautiful bits of everyday, reminding me over and over that He was in charge. He created the world and everything it and he wants and commands me to live my life joyfully, not filled with anxiety.

I look for beautiful things now.  Through the lens of my camera more often than not these days.

A few months ago God threw a new challenge my way.

 I was diagnosed with malignant melanoma.

I spent two months waiting for answers. Answers came. At least, some of them. So far so good. . . 

Next week's surgery and the resulting biopsy report a few weeks later will, God willing, give us the whole story.

Beauty in the everyday has become even more precious.

And. . .

Odd as it sounds, my anxiety has slowly slipped away to be replaced with a deep down certainty that, come what may, God is in control.

 I never was.

He never meant for me to live a life of I should and I must.

God gave me life to live to the fullest, talents to use for his glory, and love to pour out on everyone he sends my way.

However long or short that life might be.

Because really. . . any one of us could get hit by a bus tomorrow.

All we ever really have is today.

And I intend to spend  a part of every today I am given. . .

 Looking for the beautiful.

Check back each day this month as I post on Looking for Beauty in the Everyday. (at least. . . I hope I meet the challenge of posting everyday. . . !)